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Super Smash Brothers Rants

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(no subject) [Apr. 29th, 2011|12:28 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

nesshelper
Nope, this is certainly not similar to the post in f_emblem_rants. (Of course, this does deserve it.)


Dear Smash Wiki users:

A wiki is supposed to be un-biased. By this, I mean that it shouldn't have opinions leaning towrds one side or another, meaning that at least a good part of your personal thoughts should be kept to yourselves or confined to your user pages. Yup, the info you give can be sometimes useful for tournaments and all, but it brings me to one of your biggest flaws.

Please, PLEASE stop the goddamn tiering and matchuping.

Believe it or not, a character that isn't a melee demon isn't close to being a be-all end-all character, while characters who need projectiles to be effective are not inherently bad. And Captain Falcon may not have good priority, but he can smack you around if you don't keep your guard up. Now while there are some blatant imbalances like with Ganondorf, Falco, and Wario, even they have their strengths/weaknesses, pitiful as they are. In short, LEAVE YOUR GOD DAMNED META KNIGHT OVERHYPING AND LINK, ZELDA, AND CAPTAIN FALCON BASHING OUT OF THE WIKI PAGES! That's not what they're there for!

Really, when you use poor Meta Knight's page to "browbeat" and "yell" at Link for being soooo slow and having suuuuch fail ability to deal with chaingrabs and whatever other idiotic stuff (seriously? Link outranges Meta Knight in melee AND actually has *GASP* projectiles), one knows that you guys aren't much better than the reviled Smashboards that bash everyone left and right.

Irritated,
nesshelper
LinkWill you enter the fray?

One of those "oh hod I was an idiot" rants. [Jun. 24th, 2010|09:12 am]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

radish_lily
[Tags|]
[Current Music |KOTOKO - agony | Powered by Last.fm]

Dear SSB fandom,

I ran into this community about thirty minutes ago and am wondering why I didn't write this something like two years ago.

This is a baffled love letter to the fandom.Collapse )

All my love,
a radish previously better known as Hikaru Tsukiyono
LinkWill you 3 battles|enter the fray?

I just love how people believe Meta Knight is God/broken, don't you? [May. 24th, 2010|08:03 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

nesshelper
Meta Knight is not broken, people. He is good at close range, but beyond that, any character can camp him, either with projectiles or just by outpowering him.

"I'll just get past the projectiles and power moves and pound y-" You think I'll just make a move just like that? No, I'll just wait for you to approach, and you'll have to sooner or later and I don't have to worry about any outside stall penalties. Why would I want to rush somebody who must make up for having no projectiles? I'll just throw potshots to chip at your percentage, and if you rush me, I'll hit you quite a bit, putting you seriously behind.

"Yeah right you can hit me, I can 0 frame attack j00 n00b." Nice try, but even if you do, speed is inherently shallow. You may automatically win several times, but your individual repeated wins have virtually little value. Me, I can just win any one time and it has considerably more value, even without considering Meta Knight is freaking light (good thing if we want to talk Momentum Cancel). Tactics is on my side. I'll just survive your abuse and figure out how to fight back.

"No, I'll just tornado you and stunlock y-" Except I'll just jump over the tornado as soon as I see it come out. And as soon as it finishes, you're open. Even if I still get caught by the tornado, Meta Knight can hardly stop counterattacks.

"Shut up. I'll gimp your a-" Get me off the stage first, and then we'll talk. Even if you do get me off the stage, I can just fight back reliably.

"Infinite Dimensional Cape wi-" Sorry, that bug is so bad that the Smash communities, who haven't banned Icies' deathgrab, have banned IDC.

"I'll just outprioritize you." Except if I focus on outprioritizing you, I might as well have a shallow playstyle. Last time somebody tried being a darwinist, they got shot dead by an anti-hero for the atrocities they commited, including the nuking of a good commander.

So there you have it. Any more points for me to counter?
LinkWill you enter the fray?

This place is empty... [Jan. 10th, 2009|02:21 am]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

vulpixi_misa
[Tags|, , ]
[Current Mood |depressedsunk]

Dear SSB Fandom,
I'm sorry, but you suck.Collapse )
LinkWill you 11 battles|enter the fray?

WTFH4X evasion can't beat Meta Knight? [Nov. 11th, 2008|10:53 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

nesshelper
Dear tourney***s, AKA abusers of the tier and matchup systems,

First, Meta Knight is not broken. My reaction time is garbage and I can beat humans who abuse him. There is no way that is plausible if he were truly broken. Meta Knight is just easy to pick up. Why don't you get your heads out of your ***es and actually smack him around, especially when you claim that Pit's arrow spam is easier to beat than any other spam. That's another thing: it is not. And I know you're going to talk off my reaction time being bad, but get it straight: the designated projectile users of the original SSB were never anywhere near as outright abusive with projectiles, and Fox already could bounce back projectiles. Why should Pit be so nasty with his arrows? It's especially a problem because it destroys heavyweights completely. They are stuck unable to close the distance before their damage hits a high rating. Heavyweights should have room for adapting per their extended stamina, but you can't make use of that if you're brought up to kill range too easily and can't evade to save your life.

You wonder why you're mocked badly.

Utter contempt now,
nesshelper
LinkWill you enter the fray?

Hey, new here too. Lol. [Sep. 9th, 2008|11:19 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

vulpixi_misa
[Tags|, ]

Hey Smash Bros Fandom?

Why can't I get more Pokemon Trainer Red love? And I mean, not with Lucas. ...You're going to force me to write one, aren't you?

Signed
Atsuko


Dear Melee Event 50

...Can I finish this and do Event 51 alrady so I can get the Sound Test? Please? It's already been two years since we've had Melee and Brawl is more complete than that. It's all because of this. ...And the Multi-Man, but I never do any of those. >_>

Signed
Atsuko


Again, Smash Bros Fandom?

Where did that Smash Mansion come from? It's not in the manual or anywhere in the game. ._.

Signed
Atsuko


AGAIN Smash Bros fandom,

Can Pit stop being a pussypathetic uke already? He's a fighter and a warrior and stuff, just because he's an angel and all, doesn't mean he has a "RAPE ME PLEASE" sign attached to his back. =/

Signed Atsuko


Dear Mod, can I get more tags? You can delete this message afterwards.
LinkWill you enter the fray?

Boss Battles. PERIOD! Er, EXCLAMATION MARK TIMES TEN! [Sep. 4th, 2008|04:51 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

ephraim225
[Tags|]
[Current Mood |angryangry]

Cut for spoilers.Collapse )
Yours truly,

Some ticked off dude whose name is Ephraim225
LinkWill you 1 battle|enter the fray?

(no subject) [Sep. 3rd, 2008|10:50 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

nesshelper
[Tags|]

Dear abusers of tiers and the matchup system,

What was the point of the game again? Oh, that's right: to have fun. Your Meta Knights and their sickening priority and tornado abuse are not welcome. Your Pits and their arrow spams are not welcome. Your ROBs and their spammable attacks for a guy who just plain refuses to die are not welcome....okay, maybe that last one might be acceptable. Still, thank you for causing the reasons why the game deserves to be put on Broken Base on TVTropes. Not that the trolls are any better. They're worse. But that's not a viable excuse for your actions.

Honestly, tiers just shows seriously faulty balance between the characters. And the matchup system....don't get me started. It might be fine in Pokemon where you have 6 Pokemon to work with and you can manage a few workarounds on the elemental system by teaching your Pokemon "sucker punch" moves, even in R/B/Y. But in Brawl, you can get screwed in tournaments by bad matchups. You have room for only two characters, 3 at the most. It makes double-blind seriously flawed. And in the third match, if you lost first, you have to freaking pick first and you can be screwed quite easily.

I don't care what your job is. Petition Sakurai for stuff to balance or otherwise improve a future Smash game.

No love,
nesshelper

--

Dear trolls who would abuse "the meme",

Leave my friends alone. You have some nerve to lump them in with the abusers of tiers and the matchup system. Wavedashing is a glitch. Marth's "infinite grab"--or actually, infinite grabs in general--is a glitch. Olimar's "whistle armor" is a glitch. Meta Knight's "infinite dimension cape" is a glitch. They won't be abusing any of that and yet you regard them as the same sort of people who do?

What's it matter what I talk about anyway. You're just the scum of the Earth considering your actions to begin with. Roast in Hell. You would deserve to be mentioned on Broken Base too.

Just utter contempt,
nesshelper
LinkWill you enter the fray?

i can't take it anymore - i'm sorry. [Jun. 13th, 2008|06:17 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

sailorvfan10
[Tags|]
[Current Music |Blink 182 - All The Small Things]

Dear Author I beta for, a word if you please.

I can't take your fic anymore - I'm sorry, but I just can't. [LONG.]Collapse )

Abridged version: if your fic makes me want to copy it into a word processor and rewrite the whole thing, you're doing it wrong. Because as your beta, I can't rewrite the fic for you, and I can't write the fic for you. That's your responsibility.

And you make it so hard.

From your darling beta who will be telling you "I have RL, sorry",
Jayden
LinkWill you enter the fray?

(no subject) [Jun. 7th, 2008|12:16 pm]
Super Smash Brothers Rants

sailorvfan10
[Tags|, ]
[Current Mood |aggravatedaggravated]
[Current Music |Aikawa Nanase - Midnight Blue]

Dearest Adventure Mode,

Die in a fire. You're easy until the Elimine damned Underground Maze. I think I've battled all of the Links and I still cannot find the stupid Triforce. Meanwhile, Marth is getting raped by Redeads which is actually pretty funny to watch and I'm trying hard not to throw my Gamecube controller through the screen of the TV.

Oh and don't get me started on the "Escape from Brinstar" bit. I can never manage to beat it, even with Samus.

WHY MUST YOU HATE ME SO?

Jayden
LinkWill you 3 battles|enter the fray?

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